11 Weed Hacks For The Resourceful Stoner
As fun as smoking weed can be, every frequent stoner knows that getting high isn’t always as simple as we would like it to be. Grinders go missing, pipes break, cotton mouth will always try to wreck your make-out sessions, and lighters that were accounted for while you were grinding, packing, and/or rolling always seem to vanish the second you’re ready to take that first puff.
Fortunately, though, despite the numerous stereotypes that would suggest otherwise, stoners can be pretty dang resourceful, (especially about their bud) so there are a lot of cool weed hacks that can make your whole high experience much simpler and even more enjoyable.
If you’re a marijuana enthusiast, then you already know there’s a vast wealth of weed wisdom out there to aid you with even the most ridiculous of pot-related problems. But whether you’re a weed genius, a weed novice, or somewhere in between (like myself), there are certain pot hacks that are simple enough for any smoker to take advantage of.
1. Use A Bobby Pin To Clean Ash Out Of Your Bowl & De-Clog Your Pipe
I can’t even count how many times I’ve used one of my bobby pins to clean the ash out of a bowl, or de-clog a pipe or a one-hitter. It’s perfect, because I pretty much always have a bobby pin handy. The only downside to this hack is, if I need to de-clog my actual pipe instead of just my bowl, I have to straighten out (and thus ruin) my bobby pin to do it вЂ” but bobby pins are super cheap and incredibly effective at clearing passageways.
2. Keep Lip Balm With Your Weed Paraphernalia
Weed can dry my whole mouth out fast, and not having access to lip balm when that happens (especially when trying to initiate a make-out session) can be pretty miserable. So I keep some lip balm wherever I keep all my weed stuff. I also try to remember to keep some in my handbag and/or pockets for when I’m smoking away from home. That way, when cotton mouth turns my lips to sandpaper, the sweet, soothing solution is always within my grasp.
Personally, I prefer a mint-flavored lip balm, because it helps with dry lips, as well as any unfortunate smoker’s breath I might develop, and also just because you won’t find a much tastier mixture than good bud and yummy mint.
3. . And Sunglasses Too
A chemical component in marijuana causes the blood vessels in eyeballs to dilate. So sunglasses are essential if I’ve been daytime smoking and then have to go out in public. It’s so much easier to relax and enjoy my high when I don’t have to worry about my eyes looking too red. Plus, UV rays are no joke. So, I keep a pair of shades in my handbag at all times.
4. Suck On Candy Or Mints While You Smoke
Personally, I’d give Jolly Ranchers a try вЂ” but pretty much any kind of candy or mint will work well, too. I just pop the treat into my mouth while I’m prepping my bowl/bong/joint/blunt/vape, suck on it until I can really taste all its sweet and/or sour-y goodness, and then keep it in my cheek while I puff. It’s indescribably delicious, and it also helps combat both cotton mouth and the munchies.
5. Use A Clean Penny & A Pill Bottle As A Makeshift Grinder
Losing and/or misplacing my grinder sucks. But if I have access to a penny and any kind of pill bottle, it doesn’t have to keep me from getting lifted. I clean the penny (or whatever coin) with rubbing alcohol first (because money is notoriously gross), then drop a nugget or two in an empty pill bottle with the clean penny, pop the bottle’s lid into place, and shake. Voila!
6. Smoke Before Meal Times
The munchies can be overpowering. But when I’m able to plan my highs around my meals (particularly if I just wait to smoke until I’m about to eat dinner), then I’m able to avoid the over-indulging that is often associated with smoking marijuana. The food also tastes even more delicious, and I’m actually likely to have a better sense of when I’m full when I eat with a spirit of high mindfulness.
7. Keep A Back-Up Stash Somewhere Safe
I’m by no means suggesting you should go all Ilana Wexler and hide weed in your body cavities. Also, running out of weed really isn’t that big of a deal, unless you’re using it to treat a medical condition.
That said, I still think it’s nice to have a back-up stash sometimes. Especially because, in true stoner fashion, I sometimes forget about it for a good while and then happen upon it at the most opportune time. Just don’t forget to store it well (mason jars are great) and keep it somewhere your pets and young relatives won’t find it.
8. Make Your Own Bong Out Of A Plastic Bottle
OK, so I’ve never actually made my own DIY bong вЂ” but it looks pretty easy. Plus, you know, reduce, reuse, and recycle.
9. Keep Lube Handy
While weed can actually make sex more enjoyable for many people, some report that it can also cause vaginal dryness вЂ” so in my experience, it’s a good idea to keep lube handy if you’re planning to bong and bang. Personally, I love lube, and would suggest using it whether you’re having sex while high or sober вЂ” but since vaginal dryness is just the worst, stay stocked up on lube if you and your partner like to smoke before having sex.
10. Create Your Own “Chill Out” Mantra For When You’re Feeling Paranoid
Smoking weed rarely makes me feel paranoid, but I have gotten high and then freaked out super hard a couple of times вЂ” and because of those experiences, I now have a mantra to calm myself down. What I like to tell myself is this: “everything is exactly the same as it was five minutes ago вЂ” you’re just high.” Feel free to repeat this to yourself if you’re ever feeling freaked out after getting high вЂ” or make up your own mantra.
11. Use A Drop Of Honey To Keep Joints From Burning Too Quickly
I’ve never tested this out myself (mostly because I can’t roll for sh*t). But I have heard that if you rub a drop of honey over the skin of a rolled joint, it helps prevent said doobie from burning too quickly. Also, it probably smells and tastes delicious.
As fun as smoking weed can be, every frequent stoner knows that getting high isn’t always as simple as we would like it to be. Grinders go missing, pipes break, cotton mouth will always try to wreck your make-out sessions, and lighters that wereвЂ¦
Best Stoner Hacks
February 12, 2020 5 min read
We know you’ve probably already looked up stoner hacks on reddit, but we’ve created a list of secret stoner tips that you probably haven’t heard before. These pro stoner tips will teach you how to be a better stoner and are true life hacks for us potheads wanting to elevate the stoner lifestyle through resourcefulness and ingenuity. Now take a hit from your bong and buckle up, because we’re going for a ride!
Mango and Marijuana
The combination of this tropical fruit and sweet mary jane provides you the ultimate stoner experience , as mango intensifies the effects of marijuana. Myrcene, a terpene found in mangoes, interacts with THC and increases the maximum saturation level of the CB1 receptor. This means that if you consume mango about 45 minutes prior to cannabis consumption, the psychoactive effects will be at an all-time high and you will maximize your smoke sesh. This is perfect for the times you’re running low on ganja or you’re trying to practice self-control and stop at one joint. Make the most out of your weed and increase your fruit intake at the same time!
Stoner Playlists to Move and Groove with MJ
Sometimes (most times) a little music can motivate you to get on with your day. Especially if you’re lighting up when that music hits it is an unbeatable combination. We highly suggest you queue up a playlist that will leave you energized, inspired and feeling good. Whether you listen to hip-hop, reggae, or just need some background noise, check out our best Spotify playlists for when you’re high . You can also take advantage of the Spotify Made For You Playlists if you’re already high and can’t seem to get it together with your music choices (it happens).
Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk, or Weed
We’ve all had an experience where we’re about to roll or pack a bowl and your freshly grinded weed spills EVERYWHERE. I’m sure you’re annoyed just thinking about it. But have no fear, the nylon and vacuum trick is here! You can use nylon (or a sock, preferably a clean one) to wrap around the vacuum suction. Turn on your vacuum and start sucking up that green, then when you’re finished and the vacuum is turned off – your weed is cleaned up and you can still use it!
As a side note, planning ahead as a stoner is ideal and can avoid costly mistakes. If you have a habit of dropping your weed on carpet or anything similar, make sure to grind and prepare your weed on a flat surface to avoid any messes.
Eyedrops Before Your Smoke Sesh
This always seemed like a no-brainer but people are constantly amazed by this little hack. If you are a functional stoner and are about to go to work, or see mom and pop and haven’t come out to the family yet about your love of the leaf, then this hack is for you . Apply eye drops (ones that combat redness is recommended) before you smoke. Your eyes will never get red and give you that stoned look we all know too well. Voila! It’s that simple. You’d be surprised how many people forget to use eye drops and it’s a little too late when your eyes are already red. If you don’t have the time to be looking stoned, keep eye drops on deck at all times and apply apply apply. It works every time! And now you can go Thanksgiving and all of your family gatherings blazed. You’ll get along better than ever!
Isn’t it frustrating when your joint is burning way too quickly and it starts to become uneven? It totally throws off the entire vibe and can kill the mood. We got you, honey! If you line your joint with honey, it will help to burn slowly and evenly. You don’t need to apply too much, so start small. Not only is this a typical household item that can be found almost anywhere, but your joint will also taste delicious! It’s a win-win.
As a stoner, you are obliged to have the essentials when trying to get high. Weed, grinder, papers, pieces, lighters, the list goes on. It is best to keep a box handy so you can stash your cannabis belongings in a safe place. Especially if your stash could be accessed by children, it is best to keep your equipment hidden and out of the way. You can use any box laying around, or you can step it up a notch and get a smell-proof bag that cuts out the paranoia especially while on the go. Keeping a stash box will help you stay organized and ready to roll on a moment’s notice.
That moment when you’ve packed a fresh bowl, got your munchies warmed up for your post-toke pleasure, all you need is a lighter, but classically you’ve lost it again. Behold the lighter magnet trick. If you glue a small magnet to your bong (or stash box) you can attach your lighter and never have to search for it again. This also helps you identify those moments where someone is “accidentally” stealing your lighter and you can call them out quickly when you notice it is not right where it should be. Also, don’t be that person that steals lighters.
For the functional stoners that like to smoke during their lunch break and return to work as if nothing happened – you need to be on your A-game to pull this off. It is definitely doable, but as a disclaimer, you should always know your limitations. Getting too high and not being able to return to work is never a good look and we do not recommend this. What we do suggest, is having essentials in your stash box so that you’re able to cover your tracks.
Jacket : helps to mask the smell and avoid transferring onto your work clothes.
Hand Gloves : optional, it helps to avoid smelly hands but it may get you some weird looks if it’s summer in Los Angeles and you’re wearing Havaianas.
Body Spray : people will notice your perfume instead of smelling the spliff you just smoked. But don’t go crazy. No one likes the overpowering pungency of Axe. Reminds us of junior high when all the girls gave you a five-foot radius.
Eyedrops : previously covered so you know the deal. Reminder to apply before consumption.
Hand Sanitizer : wash your hands afterward, it makes a world of a difference.
Travel-sized Mouthwash : swish in your mouth before going inside, no need to bring a toothbrush and do all the extra stuff mid-day. You’re welcome.
The best stoner hacks could be an infinite list. There are too many gems to share, but this list is a good place to start. These hacks are not to overwhelm you, but to enhance your experience! Remember to enjoy it because that’s the whole point. What is your best stoner hack that’s not on this list? Share with us in the comments!
Learn the best stoner hacks that you will highly benefit from. Enhance your high and learn little tricks that will change your smoking experience for the better.